One where you write a letter to 17-year-old you.

Can you even imagine actually being able to go back?

       When I first saw this trend, it was going around social media, encouraging people to post their "Letter to 17-year-old me". I had seen a few other people's iteration of the trend, and then I decided to give it a quick try on my Threads account. I'm usually resistant to participating in internet trends. Unless it's for a good cause (ice bucket challenge) or genuinely connects to something inside me. This one connected. I could picture 17-year-old me with extreme ease. I thought for a second and typed out my attempt within my character limit. Within seconds of posting it, I knew I wanted to turn it into a blog and make it a longer, more comprehensive, proper letter to my younger self.

Here's my original attempt that I posted on Threads a few weeks ago.

I met 17-year-old me for coffee today

She was in big jeans & a hoodie. I was in leggings & a hoodie

She was early, I was running late (4 kids)

She told me about an ex she just left. I told her I met a great guy about a year later, he's the best husband & dad

I told her to always believe how great a mom she WILL be. She told me she’s proud of ME

She asked if I was happy, I told her joyful, it's better

She asked if life was what I dreamed it would be. I told her NOPE! Darling, much better! 💖

       Below, you will find the full letter. As I write this, I am the mother of 4 daughters ages 23, 17, 15, and 10. My oldest daughter will graduate college this summer (just a handful of weeks away from today), my second girl begins her senior year in the fall, my third daughter will be a sophomore in high school, following closely behind #2 for her high school graduation, and my baby just turned ten yesterday. I'm entering a new season of life, a new season of motherhood, a new season of personal and professional heights.

Dear Becky,                                                                                                                                               Wednesday, May 28th, 2025

It's been a longtime coming. Yes, I called you that, even though now, we fully go by Rebecca. Like, everyone except mom, dad Len, and minimal family (that we don't see very often), refer to us as Rebecca now. Let me tell you about that. It was about the time we got our first job after graduating from high school when we began going by Rebecca. It was only professionally at first. After a little while though, we realized we preferred it. Being called Becky didn't feel authentic. It was a nickname we felt disconnected with, and in our thirties, we started pushing back. We also realized that it was kind of a trigger, and it didn't feel aligned. Now let's get down to it. The real reason I'm writing this letter to you at 42 years old.

As a child, nobody protected your spirit in this world. At least not in any way that felt safe to "little you". You felt that you needed to live life smaller, feeling shushed and also maybe even unintentionally shrinking your creativity. This made you grow up to be a little untrusting of your relationships and constantly anticipating being called "too much" or "too loud" by the people you surround yourself with. The season of life you are in currently, is a final attempt at a blatant rebellion of this narrative of you before submitting to a "Good Girl" existence post high school. If I could give you one single piece of advice for this summer, it would be to slow down and soak up your last summer as a child, before this world begins recognizing you as an adult this winter. Make better choices through summer and you won't start your senior year in out-patient rehabilitation for substance abuse. Focus on your future as the opportunity for you to show the world who you are and what actually matters to you, instead of trying to disguise your pain, and prove your independence through irresponsible decision making.

Once you graduate next summer will feel jarring. Your closest childhood friend will be moving far away, across the country, on the exact same day you will walk for commencement. This will make you feel an entirely new level of disconnection and loneliness. Look to fill this void with productive projects that will contribute positively to the world. Don't let yourself carry the opinion of guys too close to your heart. You'll meet the best one for you the holiday season after you graduate. Life will be complicated, you will feel confused and disbelieving, but it's okay to fall. This one makes you feel safe enough to begin healing the hurts from those who came before him. He will make you feel seen like no one has ever made you feel seen before. You will doubt his loyalty, you will question the chances it works, and ultimately you will decide to trust him with your heart. It works out for you both, and even though right now you hate the idea of kids, you'll end up with some pretty epic kids anyways. Being a mom will be the single most challenging and equally rewarding experience of your life. Plus, try not to doubt yourself so much, especially as a mom. Your kids still thin you are pretty cool, even as teenagers and young adults, and let's be honest, that is the real measure of success! You will come to become the most dazzling version of you as a result of the love that surrounds you as you head into your forties!

Lastly, I'd like to leave you with a few pieces of advice. Call them mantra's, life tips, or foundational pillars to build your entire adult life on. Whatever you want to call them, these tips are some of the most important things, that took me too many years to learn. I feel like if I could impart this wisdom, worded this way, to you before you become an adult, a mom, and a partner and wife, it may have saved ma a whole lot of trouble and trials in my twenties and thirties.

               1. Self-love is the most important love there is. It's the absolute best, always what you need kind of love that we all need

               2. Self-care is not selfish at all. It's basic survival and if you aren't doing it for yourself, it won't get done, and you will suffer.

               3. Healing is necessary even though it's uncomfortable, and it's not a linear journey that ends, it's a messy new normal.

               4. You are not a participant in life, trying to climb out of a pit and scale mountains, you are a vessel to be filled abundantly.

               5. In life you must fill your own vessel as a priority so that you are the best version of yourself to overflow into your people.

               6. Perfect is an illusion so, don't waste your time chasing it. Those pretending to be perfect are typically hiding the most.

               7. Legacy and contribution to society matter far more than status or bank account balances and investments. Be kind. 

Now that I've gone full grown woman on you, head into summer with a positive mindset, a few productive goals, and the intention to soak up every second of your last summer as a child, savoring and remembering as much as you possibly can!

~ Live Dazzling

Rebecca Jackson